At The Point Of No Return.
Dec. 7th, 2012 03:38 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pekelekeTitle: At The Point Of No Return.
Fandom: Harry potter (Snarry)
Characters: Harry Potter, Severus Snape, Draco Malfoy
Author: pekeleke.
Rating: G.
Word count: 961.
Disclaimer: Don't own these characters. No money is being made out of this work.
A/N: Unbetaed. Written for the adventdrabbles 2012 Prompt 7: Snow-globe.
This is the seventh part in my Seeking Home series.
Summary: Severus has reached the point of no return. His decision will now become... irrevocable.
At The Point Of No Return.
“Let me get this straight: Potter, and not just any old Potter, but THE Potter baked you a gingerbread house”
“It wasn't just a gingerbread house, Draco. It was...”
“Let me finish! He baked you this gingerbread house and you put him through his paces. Laid one of your subtle tests for him and went back home, expecting him to fail it, so that you could feel self-righteously justified about rejecting the poor sod.”
“I don't do that, Draco”
“Yes, you do. You did it to me. To my father. To Dumbledore... You do it to everyone, no matter what kind of relationship we're seeking. No matter who we are or what we want from you. Never mind the fact that these tests of yours allowed the Dark Lord in, and my father, but left good people out”
Severus shifted uncomfortably in his chair.
“Draco...”
His ex-student smiled wanly, holding daintily onto his tea-cup and looking for all the world as fragile as a doll crafted out of spun-glass.
“It's alright, Severus. I'm not mad about that any longer. You're the way you are and that's what makes you... beautiful”
“Don't do this, Draco...”
“I'm sorry. I... I can't believe Potter passed your test. It's so... unfair!”
Severus left his chair abruptly and walked towards the window on the other side of the room. It was snowing outside and the wispy snowflakes swirling wildly in the cold air reminded him of the old snow-globe Albus used to keep atop his desk. He sighed, feeling trapped and uncomfortable in the building silence. He disliked being reminded of the inappropriate crush Draco had developed during the last year of the war. He hadn't been able to reciprocate the boy's desperate feelings. Hadn't wanted to do so. Hadn't believed them to have much substance and his ruthless attempts to destroy them had wounded the young Malfoy heir deeply.
“So he got past your test, but you still resisted. Then he gathered all that gryffindor courage and confessed his love in a moonlit courtyard, of all places...”
“Please, stop. Whatever you've got to say has probably crossed my mind a million times already. I don't want to hurt you more than I already have, Draco. This is none of your dammed business”
The teacup rattled as the younger man plunked it forcefully on the side-table.
“My father is rotting in Azkaban. My mother is mad with grief and doesn't leave her rooms. You're the only thing I've got, Severus... Of course this is my business!”
“I don't require your approval to live my life as I see fit”
“Do you really think I don't know that? This isn't about jealousy, Severus. This is about common sense!. Getting involved with Potter will ruin your reputation. The press will rip you to shreds if this comes out...”
“That's about to happen. Someone who saw us at Rosmerta's tipped off The Prophet. Rita Skeeter owled me this morning, asking for my thoughts on the article she wrote for tomorrow's front page.”
“Deny it. Please... Deny it!. Tell her you were sharing a few drinks with a colleague. Let her know you're in a relationship with me, if she insists. I'll back you up.”
He turned around, confronting the pleading look on Draco's face with skin-deep determination.
"I can't do that. I won't. I'm tired of hiding.”
”No one will allow an ex-Death-Eater to be Potter's happy ending. Can't you see that you're heading down a path of self-destruction?”
“I've been on a path of self-destruction all my life, child.”
Draco's fist banged fiercely against the table.
“This is not a laughing matter! If you wanted a younger lover why the Hell did you reject me? I'm a safer choice for you!”
Severus raked a stressed hand through his long hair, addressing that bewildered question with all the gentleness he could muster.
“You didn't want a lover. You wanted a father figure and that's exactly what I gave you. I haven't yet become callous enough to take advantage of an offer made in utter desperation by a lost, vulnerable, child. Back then you needed a mentor, Draco, not a beast willing to fuck you into the mattress.”
“You've got no idea of what I needed.”
“You've got no idea of what I need, either.”
Draco's narrow features turned ashen.
“Potter... Potter's what you need. He's your choice, isn't he? That's why you brought me here”
“I wanted to be the one to tell you. I don't want to hurt you further.”
Draco's stormy gaze filled with dark shadows.
“I hate him... I. Hate. Him! He's taken everything I've ever wanted away from me! Why him, Severus? Why? What has he got that I lack?”
Severus closed his eyes with sorrow. He could not stand the pain in Draco's voice...
“He doesn't need me like you do. He simply... wants me. One of these days you're going to find a wonderful someone who'll make you see the difference. Then you'll be real glad I didn't take your offer...”
Twin rivers of heartbroken tears marred the delicate beauty of Draco's features and Severus would have sacrificed a great deal to see them vanish.
“That day hasn't arrived yet, Severus. Please... please, I beg you!... think about what you are doing. Pursuing Potter is madness. You're standing at the edge of disaster, but you could still back out safely. I can give you...”
“No. You can't. I'm determined to follow this path and you must make your peace with it, Draco. I'm not meant for you. I was never meant for you and the faster you accept that, the faster you'll be able to move on. You deserve to find some happiness, just as I deserve to have this chance to... dream...
(no subject)
Date: 2012-12-09 04:11 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2012-12-10 01:22 am (UTC)