Loving Warriors.

[pekeleke]

Title: Loving Warriors.
Author: pekeleke
Pairing(s): Severus Snape/Harry Potter
Challenge: Written for hogwarts365 Prompt #322#3: Obstruction.
Rating: G
Length: 365
Warnings: Angst.
Disclaimer: Don't own these characters. I make no profit from writing fanfiction.
Summary: I lie alone on our rumpled bed, wondering how to help him. Life, that miserable bitch, has taught my Severus to hide his weak spots, so he does.

A/N: I want to dedicate this particular work to mywitch. I don’t know you very well, but your Harry Potter art is one of the most beautiful things in the fandom. Seeing your posts never fails to lift my spirits, so here is my humble contribution to your birthday celebrations. I sincerely hope this drabble makes you smile. Happy Birthday! :D
 

Loving Warriors.

Severus finally wakes, gasping for breath and drenched in the cold, sticky sweat of utter terror. His first instinct is to cover his mouth, muffle the sound of his agitated breathing behind shaking fingertips. In the darkness of our bedroom, I watch him struggle to calm himself, waiting for the moment he’ll look my way to ensure his latest nightmare hasn’t woken me. I fake sleep when he does and his relieved sigh breaks my heart. I don’t know why, but Severus hates it when I try to comfort him in moments like this. Vulnerability doesn’t fit him well.

Moonlight-pale and silent on bare feet, Severus abandons our bed and locks himself in the bathroom. I open my eyes once more; stare at the door he’s just closed, the wall he builds between us whenever his monsters visit, and wonder if I’ll ever find a way past this obstruction; if he’ll ever let me have all of him.

It’s 2 am in the morning, and the love of my life has just started the shower. I can see him in my mind’s eye, leaning against the bathroom’s cold tiles in search of the support he’s not allowing me to give him while his anguished face tilts towards the shower-head, seeking warmth. Seeking comfort. Seeking the cleansing touch of— I don’t even know what.

Does Severus need forgiveness or oblivion? Is it even healthy for him to deal with his ghosts alone? I’ve tried to convince him to see a mind healer, but he brushes the idea off with an impatient “What would a mind-healer do for me, Harry? I doubt my demons will break under the onslaught of breathing exercises and healing introspection.”

I lie alone on our rumpled bed, wondering how to help him. Life, that miserable bitch, has taught my Severus to hide his weak spots, so he does. She turned him into the ultimate warrior, someone bold and beautiful and oh-so-broken. Loving warriors is hard because Life trains them to be self-reliant. But she can go fuck herself. I’ll help him unlearn every lesson she taught him because Severus is mine now. He’s mine to hold. Mine to heal. Mine to love.

Comments

[dreamingjewel64]

My heart hurt for both of them.

[pekeleke]

I can understand why your heart hurt for both of them, dreamingjewel64, they are dealing with a very difficult situation that won't be resolved easily. Here is to hoping they find a way to heal. :)

Thanks, as always, for taking the time to both read and review another work of mine. Your kind and lovely comment was much appreciated. :)

[teryarel]

*cries*

Thank you for this heart-breaking, beautiful story, dear friend.

[pekeleke]

I'm glad you found this drabble beautiful even though it was also heartbreaking, teryarel. Thanks, as always, for taking the time to both read and review another work of mine, my dear friend. :)

[adafrog]

Poor guys.

[pekeleke]

Yes. The boys are dealing with a very tough situation in this drabble. Hopefully, they'll find a way to heal and move forward. :)

Thanks, as always, for taking the time to both read and review another work of mine, ada. Your kind and lovely comment was much appreciated. :)

[valenti1965]

Utterly poignant and so moving x

[pekeleke]

I'm glad you found this drabble so moving, valenti1965. Thanks for taking the time to both read and review it. Your kind and lovely comment was much appreciated. :)