The Soup Conundrum.
Apr. 11th, 2014 04:54 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Title: The Soup Conundrum.
Author: pekeleke
Characters: Harry Potter, Severus Snape.
Rating: PG
Warning(s): None.
Word count: 365
Disclaimer: Don't own these characters. No money is being made out of this work.
Written for: hogwarts365 Prompt #30 – Dinner at eight.
Summary: Soup or no soup... That is the question.
The Soup Conundrum.
read on rue16
“Merlin, Ron, you should have seen him... He didn't think twice before jumping into the lake to save that tiny first year. He looked so heroic when he came out, so... positively orgasmic... that he'd have turned you gay in the blink of an eye.” Harry gushed excitedly, so lost in his lustful admiration of his employer that he didn't register his friend's outraged snort.
“Saving that kid from drowning makes him a good Headmaster, not a hot would-be-lover, Harry. The words 'Severus Snape' and 'orgasmic' should never be used together in a sentence, least of all one you are so willing to voice out loud.”
“He was soaked to the bone, Ron. His clothes stuck to him like a second skin. He's thinner than he looks and his legs go on for miles. I wish he'd wrap them around me. I wish he'd coil himself around my body and never, ever, let go.”
“Don't say that sort of thing in front of me. I'm begging you, Harry.”
“I'm tired of mooning over him from a safe distance. I hate it when you tell me he's too old and bitter for me. I don't have a girly crush on him. I. Love. Him, Ron. You've got to start fighting in my corner because I'm going to woo that bastard. I want to ask him out to dinner.”
Ron gaped.
“Are you nuts? Snape will laugh you all the way to St Mungo's the moment you tell him he's 'orgasmic', Harry. He'd rather rip your balls off and use them as soup condiment than agree to do something as human as sharing a romantic dinner at eight with anyone. Least of all you, mate.”
“Is that so? Your opinion regarding my taste in soup condiments seems woefully inaccurate, Mr Weasley.”
“Snape!” “Headmaster!” They squeaked guiltily, turning around to face him with equally horrified expressions.
“Your conversation isn't as private as you imagine, gentlemen.” Severus informed them primly. “Half the pub has been listening in with rapt attention.”
Harry blushed, embarrassed.
“You came all the way here to kill me, didn't you?”
Severus smirked.
“No, Potter. I came all the way here to accept your dinner invitation.”
(no subject)
Date: 2014-04-22 02:04 pm (UTC)I'm thrilled that you found this drabble so funny, myk. Thanks, as always, for your lovely comment.
Hugs
pekeleke